My positive thinking lacks power.

Every day begins in much the same way. My alarm sounds- far too early for my liking. Drowsily, I roll over, hit snooze repeatedly until I can no longer delay the inevitable. Reluctantly, I crawl out of bed and stumble around my room attempting to prepare for the day. Despite the sluggish beginnings, I manage to make it through most days with at least a minimal amount of productivity. I tend to assume that a hot shower and a few cups of coffee are all I need to get through the day. After all, at times, I can be motivated, determined, and even self-reliant. All it truly takes to survive life is gritty determination and a bit of good luck, right?

Somehow, despite evidence to the contrary, this is how I live on a daily basis.
In America, home of the self-esteem paradigm, individuals are taught from infancy that they are, to quote Barney the purple dinosaur, “Super-dee-duper”. According to this school of thought, when one believes in himself, anything is achievable. An individual can overwork herself to the top of the corporate ladder, dribble his way to Final Four in basketball, starve herself into a modeling career, or strain their vocal chords into the Top Forty charts, with just the right amount of charm, practice, and of course, a positive self-image. It was once noted that Americans are: “The most positive underachievers in the world”.

With such mindsets prevalent in society, it is easy to lose sight of the truth. In the movie Miracle team USA’s coach presents the self-esteem crushing truth to the members of his hockey team: “Do you think you can win on talent alone? You can’t, because you’re not that talented.” It is often said that the truth hurts, and this case is no exception. No one is talented enough to get through life based on their own good merits. While this is contrary to the prevailing self-esteem philosophy, this idea brings about a new question. What is behind an individual’s success?
Jesus summed it up best when stated, “Without me, you can do nothing”. No mention is given of self- esteem or the power of positive thinking. Somehow, this verse is lost on a self-esteem obsessed culture.

Contrary to popular opinion, life is worth nothing based on one’s own merits. Abilities, skills, and intelligence are all gifts from God- and ones which are not to be taken for granted. While it is far more self-gratifying to allow back-patting and accolades for personal accomplishments, it is vital to remember the reason for success. Christ- the giver of life. Without Christ, it is impossible to take another breath. Without breath, there is no life. Consequently, without breath, it is to accomplish anything.

Although Christ is the sole reason for survival upon the earth, it is far too easy to ignore His power. The win in the big game, the much desired promotion, and the 4.0 GPA were not products of superior skill or intellect. They were gifts granted by God. How many days pass where no thanks is given to God, nor prayers petitioning his guidance and direction? How often is credit taken by an individual when it is due to God?

As I roll over and opt for the snooze function of my alarm tomorrow, I must remember to seek God’s strength to carry me through the day. I lack sufficient talented to survive the day on my own. My positive thinking lacks power.

What I Deserve

Over Christmas, it is easy to develop the "I deserve" mentality. With clever sales pitches bombarding the scenes at every turn, it is easy to believe that I TRULY deserve everything I see and desire. Santa Clause teaches that all good boys and girls receive what they want. This idea, however, is quite erroneous.

A lot of times,I think life is not fair. Often, I don't think I get what I deserve. Of course, I am not perfect, but I usually think that I at least deserve good hair days , great grades without really studying, and a wardrobe that refreshes itself with new clothes every three months.

Recently, however, I came to realize that I am GLAD that I do not always get what I deserve.

It was 1 AM on a Sunday morning. I had just graduated from college a few hours earlier. I was high on a mix of emotions, ranging from elation at completing my degree to a dread of leaving my friends with whom I have laughed, cried, and experienced near mental breakdowns.

Not ready to say 'bye', a group of friends had deiced to go bowling earlier in the evening. We were now on our way back to the campus. Laughing and joking, I was enjoying my last few hours with my friends, not suspecting that anything could go wrong on such a good night. As I stopped at at red light, I noticed a police car in my rear view mirror. Continuing my conversation, I thought little about the car. Suddenly, one of the passengers told me that the cop was trying to pull me over. I laughed and assumed that he was kidding. However, I was wrong. I felt a sinking feeling as I saw flashing lights and heard the dreaded siren blaring.

"What on earth have I done?" I wondered as I pulled onto the shoulder of the road. Desperately, I looked around my car. I might have been going five miles over the speed limit, but I really did not think I had been speeding. Then, my brother pointed out that Indiana had a seat belt law. Then, I KNEW I was in trouble. My vehicle, which only had appropriate seating for four, contained seven passengers. As I sat on the side of the road, fumbling for my license and proof of insurance, the van was full of apologizing passengers. I knew I was doomed.

My mind whirled. There was no way out of this one. If I had been speeding, I could have pretended that I did not know the speed limit or try to talk or cry my way out of a ticket. However, there was no way I could explain three people out of my car. I assumed that the officer would not believe that the three extras "magically" appeared in the back of my car without my knowing it.

As the officer exited his car, he carefully shined a flashlight through all the windows of my vehicle. I wondered exactly how dangerous I really seemed.
At long last, the officer walked over to a window and asked what we were doing. With a trembling voice, I explained that we had been bowling and were on our way back to our school. I was prepared for a half-parental speech about safety and followed by a large fine. Instead, the officer informed me that someone had committed a robbery in a vehicle matching the description of mine, and they were searching for the suspects.

With that explanation, the officer walked back to his car and pulled away.
Limp with relief, I suddenly became aware that, for once, I was very, VERY glad that I had not gotten what I deserved.

The incident caused me to realize that I often do NOT get what I deserve not as a punishment, but as a result of grace. I am thankful that I do not always get what I deserve. Often, what I deserve is not the good hair day, but the day where I oversleep and have five minutes to get ready. Sometimes, life is not fair, but I'm really better off that way. =D

Ps. Thanks to Matt, Kate, Dan, Esther, Jedd, and Ryan for riding with me and still speaking to me, even though I nearly got you guys arrested. :)

With a Little Help from my Friends

Friends have a way of defining your life. I learned this lesson as a five year old.

As the proud possessor of overalls which boasted pink and white polka dot linings, I came to a logical conclusion. Polka dot linings were far too interesting to remain unseen. Therefore, the only appropriate course of action was to pull the pocket lining inside out. Thanks to my trendsetting abilities, I soon convinced my 5 year old best friend to do the same with her rather plain pocket lining. After all, that is why we have best friends, right?

Life goes on, and we do not remain five years old forever. While best friends are there for you as five year old fashionistas, their role does not end there. As we grow older, the importance of good friends increases exponentially.

The friends which I made in college have radically changed my life. From late night talks, to early morning classes, Wal-Mart excursions, and road trips across the country, we have shared wonderful experiences with one another. We have laughed together. We’ve cried together. Through the years, we have celebrated and commiserated with one another.

One of the most amazing powers which true friendship offers is the ability to communicate without uttering a word. On a recent trip to Starbucks, I was able to have a complete non-verbal communication with my college roommate. Not only do these conversations negate the need for words, they communicate far more than a typical verbal exchange could ever relate. ­­

As life becomes more complicated, the need for true friends increases. The late-night gossip sessions of college morph into serious late-night discussions regarding life altering choices and incidents. The dreams and plans begin to take shape- often in forms which we do not expect (and often do not appreciate at the time).

From someone who will turn their pockets inside out with you, to someone who will listen as you rant for hours about life, a true friend is one who you cannot live without. A.A. Miline could not have said it better when he stated: “And Pooh said to Piglet, ‘it is so much friendlier with two’”.